Sunday, February 15, 2009

Trained Assassins

One of my goals on my list of becoming a grownup is to become physically fit. This is VERY important to important that I think about it at least once a day. The problem with all this thinking is that it tires me out. So much so that by the time I finish thinking about it, I need a nap.

There are many reasons why I want to be physically fit. My first reason is obvious. Every time I look at a 50-year-old who just got out of open heart surgery at work I think about how much I want to be physically fit. Sometimes when I am eating something especially bad for me, I can feel my arteries in my heart clogging. This is not a good feeling...especially if one does not want to be a 50-year-old open heart surgery patient...which I do not. I like my heart and I want it to be all sorts of clog free and healthy.

Another reason I want to be physically fit is because I have LOTS of really cute clothes. And due to an increase of fluffiness on my part, I can not wear these really cute clothes anymore. This puts me in an especially bad mood on Sundays because I want to wear all of my really cute clothes. The rest of the days of the week I can ignore this lack of cute clothes by wearing scrubs and pajamas. Unfortunately neither of these attires would go over well at church.

My third reason is because I want to be able to outrun any potential attackers. Currently a potential attacker would take me down. But if I was in superb physical shape, I would be able to outrun the bastard. My most wonderful friend Val, who is my physical fitness hero, would be able to outrun any potential bastard attackers. I would have collapsed into an out of breath, sweaty ball of fluff. I want to be more like Val.

Yet another reason is because I secretly want to be a trained assassin. But my undying love of cookies and pajama pants are hindering this goal. I have a major girl crush on the character from NCIS, Ziva. She is pretty much the coolest person EVER. She is a trained assassin and she kicks major butt on the show. I get all sorts of jealous when she takes down all these big bad potential attackers with her mad skills. I want to be just like her...a tough trained assassin and maybe if I worked really hard, I could get myself a cool accent also.

See, I have four solid, concrete reasons to become more physically fit but I have a problem with laziness. As in I am lazy, lazy, lazy. I would much prefer to watch NCIS and eat an entire box of oreos instead of running on the treadmill or doing Tae-bo. I need to conquer my overwhelming laziness. I need to work on my trained assassin moves. I need to get on the treadmill. I need to do Tae-Bo. I need to take my dog running. But first, I need to take a nap.


Nat said...

Exactly the same kind of thoughts that ran through my head this morning, as I laid in bed debating getting up and working out to Taebo or to just lay there. I just laid there. DOH! There's no way I would escape anyone in a dark alley.

taeboshellie said...

We want to encourage you to start your Tae Bo again, by sending you a free t-shirt! Please send us an email at and we will get that right out to you. You can do it! Have fun, and let us know how you like the workouts. Take care!
Shellie Blanks Cimarosti
Team Tae Bo

Jen said...

I feel your pain. In lieu of going to the gym this weekend, I made sugar cookies and have proceeded to eat nearly the entire batch of them my self. :)

Although I'm clearly having trouble living by this advice, if you have a goal in mind (being more fit), to be motivated by it you need to have a more concrete ways to meet that goal (e.g. go to the gym 3 days a week). The premise is that the goal to be more physically fit is to broad and vague to give you an incentive to work out. It is too hard to measure. But "go to the gym three times a week" is motivating and measurable.

I read somewhere that the common factor amongst most people who lose weight and keep it off is that they work out 275 minutes a week. That has been my New Years goal (that and lifting weights twice a week). So far I have done pretty well. I think it is just doing something you enjoy instead of just hanging out on a treadmill. I go to dance and weight classes, ride my trainer while watching 90210, and ski or skate ski. Now if I could just get myself to watch what I eat!

Becky said...

I don't know if I have told you lately but you are an amazing chicky!

I have the same goal as you on my way to finding the adult me. Zeva is amazing. The most important reason to get in shape is Macgee recognizes me as the love of his life when he finds me. My goal is to find the me where I feel comfortable in my skin again and don't think "Did the movie theater seats get smaller????" The answer is saddly NO by the way ;)

As a fellow procrastinater and justifier of all things unhealthy I vow to cheer you on in your quest to be healthy! Call on me any time you need to be motivated and we will talk ourselves into exercising and only eating one row of oreo's not the whole pack.

Love you girl

Brian & Sandy said...

I just want you to know that I read your blog to one of my co-workers (I may have told you that already). You make me laugh so hard I have to share my giggles with someone else. So, you have a new friend in Logan and her name is Janet and I will continue to share your confessions with her. Good luck with the assassin and tae-bo moves!

Valerie said...

What the what? Billy Blanks tracked you down!!! The Tae-Bo Assasin Team is now going to MAKE you work out! Hey Shellie, feel free to go to one of my blogs and leave a message about a free shirt. I would wear it with pride :)